Oh for mousin' out loud.
For mousin' out LOUD!
Oh for mousie mousin' mouses, mousin' out loud.
MOUSES!
Okay, so that last one didn't make a whole lotta sense.
MOUSES!
I'm tellin' ya, it's been non-stop all day. Non-stop, I say. Non-stop as in it has been never endin', goin' on just about this whole, entire day.
MOUSES!
Oh Peepers...
Peepers, just ignore the mess on the kitchen floor. I'll deal with it later. Maybe. Or maybe you can deal with it later as you so often end up doin'.
But the thing is, Peepers, the phone rang and thinkin' it might be for me, I raced right over to get it before whomever was callin', hung up.
What?
Because if it WAS for me, it would have been important.
WHAT?
'CAUSE I'M IMPORTANT, that's why. And due that fact, calls for me are always of the utmost importance, to be sure.
Sometimes I wonder if you know anythin' at all.
MOUSES!
But the thing is...
The thing is, Peepers, in my haste to make it to the phone in time, I jumped up on the island and skidded across it in preparation to make the leap over to the other counter. Now unfortunately, there happened to be some stuff in my way.
What stuff? The stuff that's now on the floor.
She really does know nothin' at all.
MOUSES!
So anyway...
So anyway, my friends, it all started this mornin' when VISA SECURITY supposedly called. We're callin' to inform you about two suspicious blah-blah-blahhy transactions on your blah-blah-blah-blah-blah. If you didn't make these blah-blah-blahhers, please press one to speak to a blah-blah-blah-blah, etc, etc, etc...
WELL!
Well I knew right away this was a scammy scammer tryin' to scam me. First of all, I don't have a plastic money card thingy. When I need plastic money, I just use the peep's.
MOUSES!
And secondly, the scammer didn't even know my name.
Now truthfully, I didn't actually ask. Ask him what my name is, that is. I would have asked him if he knew my name, HAD I wanted to talk to him. Or her. But knowin' it was a scammer, I didn't press that number one so we didn't actually chat. But you'd really think they would have mentioned my name first thing, you know? Which they didn't. Now that's a tell-tale scammer's manoeuvre, to be sure.
MOUSES!
Well after I hung up on him. Or her. The scammer, I mean. After I hung up on that ol' scammy scammer, I jumped down from the counter, walked past all that stuff from the island I had knocked onto the floor, gave the tea strainer thingy a good kick for good measure, and padded my way back to the family room door.
FYI, tea strainers will roll when kicked.
Good to know.
MOUSES!
Then the phone rang again.
MOUSES!
Different call; different scammer. This one was wantin' to inform me that SOMEONE was tryin' to hack my computer so would I please allow him access to it right now.
Yeah. Right. And I know JUST WHO that SOMEONE was.
MOUSES!
That's when I decided to check my e-mail.
WELL!
Well three fake fishing.. I mean, PHISHING e-mails later, I decided scammer season must be in full swing. E-mails askin' me to do this and do that, click here and click there, pay a whole bunch of bitcoins to renew whatever, and wantin' me to give 'em all my personal information along with a boxful of used litter.
Okay, so none of 'em actually asked for the used litter, BUT LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHIN', my friends: used litter is all I'm willin' to give!
MOUSES!
AND THEN...
Well, then I decided that after dealin' with all those scummy scammers, it was high time for my mid-mornin' nap. A little too early for my late-mornin' nap, perhaps, but just about right for the other.
And as I was driftin' off to sleep, I heard the phone ring once more. Now I'm not sure who it was but Peepers did answer. After that, all I heard was a super duper loud, high-pitched whistle.
Guess she's in no mood to deal with them, either.
MOUSES!
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Remember to mask up, too.
