that other guy

So it has come to my attention...

It has come to my attention that not everyone knows about James.

You know, that other guy.

MOUSES!

So let's talk about cats.  Cats that live in my house or on my property, that is.

Well we'll start with me on account of...  Well...  Well on account of my bein' the most important cat living 'round here, what with my bein' famous and all, and...

What?  What's that, Peepers?  What's that you're babblin' on about now?

NO, I am not infamous.  I'm famous, I  am.  There's a big difference, you know.

MOUSES!

Now where was I?

Oh yeah, I was talkin' about myself.

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So there's me, of course.  I, Seville the Cat, live here in this house.  The famous - not infamous - world-renowned blogger and gentlecat nip farmer that I am.

Then there is Saffron.

You all know 'bout Saffron now, right?  Saffron is my new brother who came to live with the peeps and me in early January.

Yes, he is a boy, even though Peepers gave him a girly girls' name.  But you know the peep.  She does that kinda thing.

MOUSES!

Oh, and he's not orange.  Too bad, really, on account of us orange dudes bein' so handsome and stuff.  Not to mention, what with the spice saffron bein' orange and all, it might make you think Saffron was orange, too, but alas, he is dark charcoal grey.

The peep strikes again with the inappropriate names.

MOUSES!

And now there is James.

So James showed up a few months after Saffron did.  He, too, just like Saffron, is scared of the peeps and pretty much everyone and everythin' - includin' Saffron - but he does come for food on a regular basis.  Sometimes more regular than others but you can count on him comin' for some soft mushy stuff 'bout once a day, five or six times a week.

MOUSES!

And, just like Saffron, James is a boy.

We think.

'Course with Peepers and her namin' of cats, one never knows for sure.

But actually, I am pretty sure James is a boy AND I'm pretty sure he, like Saffy Saffers Saffron Sassafras, is gonna end up bein' my brother as well.

Once Peepers gains his trust, that is.

And when she does...

When she does, I'll have TWO brothers with whom to contend.

MOUSES!

But back to the brass tacks of the matter here.  Who, you ask, is James?   What does he look like?  From where did he come?  That kinda thing.

Well...

Well he's a pretty big dude.  Certainly wasn't lackin' for food as a baby.  The guy's bigger than me, for a start.  And he is always in formal attire.

No, he's not a penguin.

*rolls eyes*

James is a tuxedo, my friends!  Yup, always dressed up in his formal black and white threads like he's headin' to the cat prom, or somethin' like that.

MOUSES!

As for from where he came, no one knows.  He just appeared outta nowhere, one day.  Right outta the blue!

Teleporation technology has not been ruled out, as of yet.

MOUSES!

So there you have it, my friends.  Now you know.  Now you know all about James.  At least as much as I know, that is.

MOUSES!

***********************

And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.

aloha

Aloha, my friends.  ALOHA!

Seville the Cat here, reportin' from Hawaii.

NOT!!!

Not even close, my friends.  NOT EVEN CLOSE!  Not only am I not in Hawaii, I'm not even anywhere warm, at all.  Not anywhere even close to warm, my friends.  Not even close!

Last night, you see, we had...

FROST.

MOUSES!

Oohhh..  This mornin' offered up a chilly reception, to be sure.  Why, I could practically see my breath in the air.

And when I say practically see my breath, what I REALLY MEAN is that had I gone out first thing in the mornin', I'm pretty sure I would have seen my breath, for sure.  However, I, bein' the ever-so-sensible cat that I am, stayed inside 'til it got a bit warmer.

MOUSES!

The peep's plants, however, were not so lucky.  They had been out all night, and...

Well...

Well frosted they got, for sure.

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The tomatoes?  They're dead.  Not that they were doin' all that well while alive, but at least they were still breathin'.

Kinda.

Sorta.

I think.

The basil and rosemary plants, she brought inside.  Good thing, too, on account of the state of those tomatoes who had been left outdoors.  Did I mention they were dead?

And the lettuce is...

Well...

Well actually, the lettuce is still growin' very nicely.

'Cept for the ones someone sat upon and squished, the other day.

MOUSES!

And if you happen to hear any reports of lettuce plants havin' been sat upon and squished by an incredibly handsome marmalade cat....

IGNORE 'EM, for those reports are the very epitome of fake news, for sure.

Kinda.

Sorta.

Maybe.

Maybe in a I-had-my-paws-crossed-behind-my-back-when-I-told-the-peep-it-wasn't-me kinda way.

And in related news...

You have any idea how difficult it is for a cat to cross his paws BEHIND his back?  We cats are simply not built that way.

MOUSES!

And as for the nip...

Well...

Well let's just say, I'm pretty sure the peep WOULD LIKE to claim that the one little survivin' nip plant we had, was killed by last night's frost, but truth be told, it was lookin' as bad yesterday, BEFORE the cold arrived, as it does today.  Truth is, it was a sorry excuse for a nip plant before, and is equally as sad, today.

What?  What's that, Peepers?  What are you babblin' on about now?

I did too.

Yes, Peepers, I did.  I did tell my readers we had a killin' frost last night.

No, Peepers, I did not.  I did not tell my readers that it was the frost that killed the nip plant, for that, ol' Peepers of mine, would have been a lie, and...

What do you mean I should have helped you grow the plant?  Growin' nip is YOUR job.  Imbibing in the nip is mine.  And...

And actually, I did help.  There was that day, remember?  That day when I felt so sorry for the little tyke of a plant, I tried to give it mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.  You know, to bring it back to life.

Okay, so it might have been more like an into-my-mouth-the-nip-went kinda resuscitation, but still...

But still, I only ate two leaves.

I left the other three.

And in related news...

It has been ruled MERELY COINCIDENTAL that the squished lettuce plants that were supposedly sat upon by an incredibly handsome marmalade cat, happened to be growin' right next to the pot containing the nip plant requiring mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.  You know, the nip plant with only five - I mean, THREE - leaves.

MOUSES!