Sunday, 9 November 2014

cherry pickin' surgeons

It happened one Saturday mornin'.  About three weeks ago, I think. Yeah, that sounds about right.

Anywho...  There I was, mindin' my own business and, of course, keepin' a watchful eye on the peeps' business, too, 'cause we all know how they need watchin', when a truck pulled up.  It parked on the road, opposite my house.  I thought to myself, "Hmmm..."

Or perhaps it wasn't to myself that I thought the "Hmmm..." Perhaps I said it aloud 'cause I do believe that Peep #1 heard me.  Made her look out the window to see what was goin' on.

Peep #1 intercepted the guy from the truck at the front door.  They talked for a bit.  I listened in to their conversation, from a safe distance, of course.

Ol' Peepers informed me that the man was a tree surgeon and was gonna be operatin' on the big 'ol oak tree at the end of my driveway.

"A surgeon?" I asked.  "A surgeon for trees?  Is the oak tree finally gettin' neutered?"

Peep #1 just looked at me.  I believe she was somewhat confused.

Then I realised my mistake.  The oak tree couldn't be gettin' neutered.  It was probably gonna be spayed.  Perhaps the peeps had decided to deal with all the acorns it drops on our heads on an annual basis.

Still, the peep looked confused.  To tell you the truth, I was a little confused, myself.  Prior to this, I had never heard of surgeons makin' house calls.  Usually one has to go to the surgeon, when needin' somethin' done.  For example, when I had my knee bionicized last year, I had to go to the hospital.  The hospital didn't come to me.

"Is the tree gettin' a bionic limb?" I asked the peep.  Perhaps that was what the surgeon was intendin' to do.  Give the tree a bionic limb just like my doctor gave me a bionic knee.

Ol' Peepers was still in a state of confusion, from what I could tell.  She wasn't answerin' any of my questions.  Rather rude, if you ask me.  MOUSES!

Next thing I knew, two more trucks arrived on the scene.  They were rather strange and loud lookin' trucks.  Yes, they looked loud.  I know you might be wonderin' how that works but suffice it to say, as I found out later, I was right on that account.

The surgeon got all geared up.  Instead of a surgical mask, he donned a hard hat.  Interestin'... Then he climbed up onto one of the trucks and as if my magic, the truck extended an arm and transported him up into the air where he darted this way and that, in and amongst the branches of the oak tree.

I peered over at the truck with the magical arm, lookin' for signs of eggbeater teleportation technology but saw none.  Weird.  To be honest, to this day I have no idea what was powerin' the arm of that truck.  Peep #1 said the magical arm thingy was a cherry picker.

"A cherry picker!" I cried.  "Of all the stupid things.  I thought you said that guy was a doctor.  A doctor for trees.  Don't doctors go to school?  Does he not know that that's an oak tree?  Even I know that's an oak tree.  I also know that oak trees grow acorns.  They don't grow cherries.  What's he thinkin', lookin' to pick cherries in an oak tree?  Of all the moused up..."

I stopped ranting on account of the look on Ol' Peepers face.  The poor peep.  She was, at that moment, realising that she had hired a doctor for trees who didn't know the difference between a cherry and an oak.  A mouses moment, for sure.

Then things started gettin' noisy.  The surgeon was magically movin' in and around the branches of the tree and he had a saw goin'.  Not the quiet little hand saw that my peep uses when she gets in one of her lumberjackin' moods but rather, a big ol', noisy chain saw.  Limbs started droppin' from the sky.  Well actually, they were droppin' from the tree but you get my drift, I am sure.

Then the second truck came to life.  MOUSES! it was loud.  Peep #1 said it was a wood chipper.

"A chipper?" I asked.  "They plannin' on makin' french fries to go with the cherry pie?"  The cherry pie made with acorns instead of cherries on account of that bein' an oak tree, I muttered to myself.

Anywho...  It turned out that there were no french fries to be had.  The wood chipper was chippin' nothin' but wood.  I watched as one of the men put the fallen branches into the chipper's mouth.  It appeared to be hungry.  I hoped it wasn't craving cherry pie.

I also made a mental note to keep a very far distance from anythin' lookin' even remotely like that wood chipper.  Looked kind of dangerous, if you ask me.

Plus, it was loud.  Louder than the surgeon's chain saw.  Loudest thing I've ever heard in my life... almost.  Peep #1's caterwaulin' comes pretty darned close.  Not quite sure which is more obnoxious soundin', though.  The jury is still out on that one.

And speakin' of loud, obnoxious noises.  I noticed that the surgeon and his...  ummm...  nurses? Anywho...  All the men workin' with the magical acorn-pickin' cherry picker and wood chippin' truck... They were all wearin' some heavy duty ear thingies to protect their ears from the noise of the saw and the chipper.  I have GOT to get myself a cat-sized pair of those.  They sure would come in handy when Peep #1 practises her caterwaulin' at home.  MOUSES!

And a cat-sized hard hat would come in handy, too.  Somethin' to protect my head from fallin' acorns from the oak tree.  The peep doesn't need one.  Her head is already hard enough.

At one point, the sound of the chipper subsided and the surgeon who, by the way, was still up in the tree, called out to Ol' Peepers who had momentarily stepped outside.  He was askin' if it was okay to remove one of the large limbs that hangs over the driveway.

I hollered, "NO!!!  That's my favourite branch!"

The peep and the surgeon ignored me, however.  The man said it was about eighty percent dead and Ol' Peepers said he should go ahead and take it.

I loved that branch.  That was my favourite branch of all.  It was almost completely horizontal and perfect for doin' the tight-rope walk.  Back and forth I would walk across that branch.  Best branch ever for doin' that sort of thing, not to mention, just hangin' out.

Oh sure, it was a high branch.  Really high, but still, excellent for tight-rope walkin'.  The squirrels liked to run around on it, too.  Now the squirrels and I have to settle for the other branch that hangs over the driveway which isn't quite as horizontal and not nearly so good.  Awww...  MOUSES!

Peep #1 later tried to console me about the loss of my favourite branch, pointing out that I hadn't actually been up there in months and months.  She reminded me that I hadn't been up there since my knee surgery last year.  I have been climbin' trees and whatnot but I haven't actually been up on that one particular branch.

Use it or lose it, is what they say.  Who knew they were talkin' about a branch in a tree?  MOUSES!

But thinkin' more about it, I hadn't been up on that branch since before my surgery in which I had my knee bionicized.  Remember that?  Remember when I tore all the ligaments in my knee and had to have them replaced with bionic ones?  The doctor said, at the time, I likely fell out of a tree.

MOUSES!  Could that have been the tree out of which I fell?  Could that branch have been the culprit?  It was really high.  Like...  really, REALLY high.  Fallin' from there onto the driveway could very well have done some damage.

At the time of my injury, I never told the peeps how it happened.  I never said a word.  And then I sort of put the whole thing out of my mind 'cause, to be honest, it was pretty sore and I just didn't like thinkin' about it.  Not to mention the fact that the pain killers were makin' me loopy.  Loopier than when I'm nipped!

But maybe that was where my accident happened and maybe, subconsciously, I had been avoidin' that branch ever since.

Nah...  Crazy that is.  Crazier than a squirrel makin' nut pies, kind of crazy.  Had I fallen out of my favourite branch, I would have remembered that. Everyone knows the real reason I hadn't been up there, as of late.  The real reason was that the grey squirrels had infiltrated the oak tree and commandeered that large, horizontal branch.  They were usin' it as their base camp.  MOUSES!

I don't know if you're all familiar with grey squirrels or not but let me tell you, they're big and they're mean. They're the biggest squirrels I have ever seen and they tease and taunt us cats like it's a national pastime or somethin'.  Sometimes, they even throw acorns at us from up in that tree.  And they only throw the icky acorns 'cause they keep all the best ones for themselves, to use in their nut pies.  Yeah, they like to bake nut pies.  They do it all the time. And you know, they're crazy.  MOUSES!


72 comments:

  1. Oh wow.....what an amazing thing that would be to watch......I assume your snoopervision was crucial to the proper execution of the surgeon's surgery?????

    Hugs, Sammy

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  2. Nissy, that whole tree thing and all the cherry picking, wood chipping stuff sounds crazy! We are sorry about that branch, but what if it really was the one from which you fell? Hugs!

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    1. I just don't remember. How could I forget somethin' like that? purrs

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  3. Sorry to hear they took your favorite branch! A tragedy to be sure. I remember when the Powers That Be cut down my favorite climbing tree at my park in order to put in a concrete walk. I wrote a letter complaining to the city, and got a really rude response, and that was all. At least you still have the tree!

    As to your question: NaNoWoofMo is a round robin told by us pet bloggers all through the month of November. This years story is about a homeless dog trying to find a new place to call home. :) We've got one kitty blogger helping to tell the story, and we definitely would like a couple more! We'd love it if you joined us.

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    1. I read the first few instalments. GREAT story! I'll see if I can think of a way to incorporate a post, okay? purrs

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  4. That tree doctor sounds a little confused. I think maybe he should have been taking direction from you, Nerissa.

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  5. That surgeon sounds really confused! We have a pecan tree in our backyard and I haven't seen anyone try to pic cherries back there either.

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    1. Has anyone driven a pecan picker back there? purrs

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  6. Sure are glad you were there Nissy to snooopervise those tree surgeons or what ever they were. Too bad they cut down your favorite branch. Oh well, more will grow on that tree. You have a great Sunday afternoon.

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  7. Great blog. You are such a cut-up Nissy. You never disappoint. Giggles galore from this feline and bi-pedal family. We can picture it all. We're thinking about moving out east... seems you have more going on than we do up here.

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    1. Teleport on over! The more the merrier, for sure. purrs

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  8. I think the whole thing sounds furry confusing !
    Glad you was safely indoors !

    XOXO

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  9. How rude to take your favourite branch. Just because you hadn't been up there since your knee was bionicised doesn't mean you were never going up again.

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    1. That's what I think, too. MOUSES! purrs

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  10. I'm just glad dere are no surgeons comin at me wif a chainsaw!

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    1. Oh yeah... Chainsaw wieldin' surgeons are never a good idea unless, perhaps, if you're a tree. purrs

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  11. Nissy, about a year ago we also had a cherry picker and a wood chipper here and it was a ton of excitement. But you did the best thing to stay inside. I did too.

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    1. Yup, best place to be when men with noisy trucks arrive at your house. purrs

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  12. Dear Nissy.I am roaring withlaughter!!One of your best blogs!So sorry you lost the favourite branch you had stopped using!Love and hugs SheenaXXX

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    1. It really was my favourite, you know? Others just aren't the same. *sighs* purrs

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  13. Poor Nissy. What you have to suffer... why don't the peeps EVER get it???

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    1. I know! They just never do. purrs

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  14. Hmph how rude is that? Took your favorite branch, we'd hide under the bed if they came.

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    1. I would have LOVED to have done that 'cept peeps require so much supervision at my house. Even WITH my supervision, they still messed up with that branch. MOUSES! purrs

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  15. OMC Nissy those squirrels fwo acorns at ya'? Weally? Wow Dat's not wight, just not wight at all. Sowwy yous losin' yous favowit bwanch but it duz kinda sound like it might not hav been a vewy nice bwanch aftew all. And maybe, just maybe yous did block what actually happened outta yous mind and dat twee wuz da one what hurt yous. Stay safe and avoid those meanies wiff da acorns fur suwe.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Lexi

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    1. Yeah, them squirrels are mean. MOUSES! purrs

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  16. What an ordeal....we're glad the "surgeon" and his crew are gone and that things are quite again. We're sorry you lost your favorite branch :(

    The Florida Furkids

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  17. Well if they gave the tree a bionic limb, maybe you could use the remote control to raise and lower it?

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    1. Oohhhh... Now THERE'S a thought! purrs

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  18. Agreed!! Sheer craziness!!!
    ღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!

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    1. Hehehehee... 'Course, the loss of my favourite branch isn't so funny. Least the squirrels lost their base camp, though. purrs

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  19. Nerissa! Those Cherry Pickers, Tree Surgeons and Chippers is horrible! Theys has decimated lots of my favorite trees in Midway! When mes sees that tree surgeon guy..mes going to attack his ankles!!!
    Kisses
    Nellie

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    1. You attack, Nellie, and I'll pee on him. What a formidable pair we will make! purrs

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  20. Dude...are you nipped out yet..cuz' after this debacle we don't see any other option!
    The REAL Maple Syrup Mob xxxxx

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  21. Sorry about your favorite branch. Glad the "surgeon" is gone now.

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    1. Yeah, me too. Peeps say he did a super good job but I say, HE CUT DOWN MY FAVOURITE BRANCH! MOUSES!!! purrs

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  22. A tree surgeon?? That sounds suspicious to me. What did he ever want with your favorite branch? Not cool!

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    1. Don't know. He said it was almost dead. Didn't look dead to me. *sighs* purrs

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  23. Replies
    1. I sure am. Weird thing is, I have NEVER been called into court to give any eye witness testimony. That's weird, right? I think it is. purrs

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  24. WELL. We say that tree had it coming. What with it THRUSTING you outta it's bosom and hurling you to the ground and all...

    A bonfire would be TOO GOOD for it!

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  25. Oh. and thank COD no wood chuckers showed up!

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    1. Yeah 'cause although the wood chipper was noisy, the wood chuckers might have pooped or somethin'. Icky. purrs

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  26. That sounds confusing ! We're glad you were safe indoor Nissy ! Purrs

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    1. Yup, best place from which to watch these weird goings on, for sure. purrs

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  27. That poor old tree...to bad he wasn't able to walk to the hospital and that you had to hear that overkilled noise, Nissy. I know all about it :( We don't know those pesky quirrels, we only know the red ones and we like them, they're not around in our neighbourhood anyway, so it's easy to like them :D Sure you find another branch to climb on, Nissy. Pawkisses for a Happy Monday :)

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    1. We used to have cute little red squirrels but the big ol' grey ones chased 'em all away. MOUSES! purrs

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  28. Wow, the whole thing makes me feel like i need a nap!

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    1. And that's a good thing 'cause nappin' is always a good thing to do. purrs

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  29. Oh Nissy, we are sorry they cut your favorite branch even if you had no desire to ever climb on it again. Just having it THERE was enough cause then you knew you could IF you wanted to. People just don't understand these things. Glad your knee is better.

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    1. That's how I feel, too. KNOWIN' my favourite branch was there gave me comfort. purrs

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  30. How disrespectful to cut off your favourite branch without asking your permission Nissy.
    It may be worth collecting all the acorns left on the floor though so you have lots of ammunition to throw if those noisy men come back.
    Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx

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    1. Great plan! I shall go collect some acorns right now. purrs

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  31. Very interesting Nerissa very indeedy interesting. Way back when I was knee high to a cats knee, which is not very high, we had those same visitin surgeons visit. Our tree took the big fall and Dad kept on about how lucky we were it fell away from the house and all. Out visiting surgeons were here and gone by lunch. Wonder if cats can get in on that racket. We would not need that cherry thingie!
    Timmy

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    1. That would be a GREAT racket for us cats. We can climb trees way better than peeps AND I have my flyin' fryin' pans for when climbin' won't do! purrs

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  32. yup, those cherry pickers are always around no matter what kind of tree. Amazing there aren't more cherry trees in the world cuz of that. I have brown squirrels and as I am indoors, they only taunt me now and then through the glass patio door. They don't do that when that door is open and only the screen keeps me away from them; heh, heh, heh

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    1. Ever lucky. We used to have the little squirrels who were much nicer than these big grey ones. The big ones know they're big and when I say big, I mean BIG! purrs

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  33. Hopefully your tree is going to be much healthier now Nissy. The crazy nut patrol will have to hang out somewhere else too so not so bad :) Hope you all have a great week!
    Marty

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    1. Peep #1 first called the surgeons on account of a branch that was practically lyin' on the power line. That branch is gone now but alas, so is my favourite. Guess it IS better that it was taken away now rather than fallin' in a year or two but still... I miss it. purrs

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  34. Sounds like Tree Surgeon should have spoken to you first Nissy MEOWWWWW. xxx

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  35. Replies
    1. They sure are. They sure are, for sure. purrs

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  36. Skwirls are like mice with fluffy tails. They sure can run fast!

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    1. Yup, you should see 'em runnin' up those trees. Trainin' for the Olympics, I should think. purrs

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