Showing posts with label 2020 harvest. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2020 harvest. Show all posts

Sunday, 8 November 2020

thirty-four weeks


BRING ON THE NIP. 


I said, BRING ON THE NIP!


Peepers, are you listenin' to me?


Well then, WHAT'S KEEPIN' YA?



BRING ON THE NIP!!!


I know, I know...  I know what you're thinkin'.  You're thinkin', why am I celebratin' havin' been cooped up in this here ol' house for thirty-four weeks with the peeps?


And in case you didn't know, thirty-four weeks is like two hundred and sixty-two MILLION, one hundred and eighty thousand, eight hundred seconds, in cat time.


MOUSES!


Well...


WELL...


Well truth be told, I'm NOT celebratin' bein' cooped up in this here ol' house for two hundred and sixty-two MILLION, one hundred and eighty thousand, eight hundred cat seconds, at all.


I mean, who would be so stupid as to be celebratin' that?


MOUSES!


What I'm celebratin' is the fact that I, Seville the Cat, HAVE NIP.


MOUSES!


That's right, my friends, my 2020 harvest has been completed and we now have A WHOLE WHACK of nip in the house.


I SAID, WE HAVE NIP IN THE HOUSE!


And it's not just any ol' nip, either.  This here catnip is primo, premium, high-grade stuff.  Organically grown, and everythin'.


NO...  No, I didn't fertilise it by sprayin'.


And thankfully, no one else did that, either.


I did what any gentlecat farmer would do.  I used sheep poopies for plant food.


But they were WELL COMPOSTED poopies, for sure!


Which makes 'em okay.


Or so I am told.


MOUSES!


But the thing is...


THE THING IS...


THE IMPORTANT THING IS, as COVID-19 numbers are surgin' in various parts of Canada as wave two of this pandemic thingy is in full force here, now, it looks like I'm gonna be cooped up in this ol' house for millions and millions of cat seconds to come.



But...


BUT...


BUT AS ANY CAT WILL TELL YOU, IT'S WAY EASIER TO BE COOPED UP WITH A COUPLE OF GOOD-FOR-NOTHIN' PEEPS WHEN YOU'VE GOT A FULL HOUSELOAD OF CATNIP ON BOARD.


MOUSES!


 ***********************

And remember:

IF IN DOUBT,

DON'T. GO. OUT.

Continue to practice SOCIAL DISTANCIN' measures

AND KEEP WASHIN' YOUR PAWS.

MOUSES!

Remember to mask up, too.