Dear Mother Nature,

Dear Mother Nature.

Hmmm... 

Now should that be Mother or Mrs?

Hmmm...

Methinks Mother sounds best.  I'm not sure she's actually married.

MOUSES!

So let's start this thing again.

Dear Mother Nature.  It's fall.  It's October.  This here is Canada.  MOUSES!

That should do the trick.  Now to stuff my letter in an envelope, slap an old stamp on the thing, and get it mailed off, lickety-split.

MOUSES!

On the other paw...

On the other paw, perhaps I should elaborate a tad further.

Hmmm...

Dear Mother Nature.  It's fall.  It's October.  This here is Canada.  DID YOU FORGET?  MOUSES!

There!  Done.  At least on my end, it is.

MOUSES!

But on the other paw...

But on the other paw, I know, first paw, how ridiculous it is for someone - like a peep - to ask me if I forgot somethin' when I forgot somethin', BECAUSE IF I FORGOT IT, I've probably forgotten I've forgotten it, so even though I have forgotten somethin', I'll be darned if I can remember that I've forgotten it, never mind remember what it is I've forgotten.

Or somethin' like that.

Kinda like tellin' someone to look up how to spell a word you can't spell in the dictionary.

MOUSES!

So I'll take a stab at this once more.

Dear Mother Nature.  It's fall.  It's October.  This here is Canada.  DID YOU FORGET?  Did you forget that 'round about now it should be gettin' chilly?  Chilly enough for summer flowers to die back, and leaves to fall and get raked up, and gardens to be put to bed before winter?  AND CHILLY ENOUGH for kitties to actually WANT to snuggle under blankies and get cuddled up by cuddlin' kinda peeps?  DID you?  MOUSES!

Okay, I think that covers all my bases.

Oh, I know!

PS.  Don't bother replyin' to this letter by sendin' ME a letter.  Just get to work with the onset of fall, please.  Fall...  Autumn...  Whatever.  MOUSES!

PPS.  Please don't tell Peepers I'm the reason for the cooler weather.  I mean, I'm pretty sure she wants to get crackin' with the puttin'-the-garden-to-bed business, but you know peeps: they're fickle.  One minute they're complainin' it's too warm for this time of year and how first frost is later than ever, and goin' on about global warmin' and climate change, and extreme and scary weather; and the next minute, they're all up in arms 'bout it bein' too cold.

PPPS.  Hope you're not a peep, Mother Nature.  If you are, please don't take my peeps-are-fickle comment too personally.

PPPPS.  Actually, now that I think about, the complainin' about weather might be more of a Canadian thing.

Hmmm....

PPPPPS.  Mother Nature, if you're a Canadian, please don't take offence to my...

Nah, I'd best leave it at that.  No need to stick one more paw in my mouth.  There might be a couple in there, already!

If you know what I mean.

MOUSES!