How very illuminatin', indeed.
MOUSES!
Not the first time I've received an invite like this. Probably won't be the last, either.
'Cause you know, I'm a very popular kinda guy.
MOUSES!
Now for those of you who follow my fan page, Nerissa's Life, over on Facebook; you already know all about this. But not all my pals are on the ol' book of faces, so some of you may not have heard. But whether you have or have not yet heard, what I'm about to tell you bears repeatin', for sure.
MOUSES!
About a week ago or so, I received an invitation from someone named Alicia B. I had previously received somethin' similar over on the ol' bird app. Apparently, Alicia and her co-conspirators are now tryin' to infiltrate Bluesky.
MOUSES!
Illuminati invitation: Based on the membership criterion of the Illuminati, we find you are of great interest in possession of a good mastery of manual dexterity and academic proficiency. With this, we look at you as the class that will be the platform for which you stand to meet the wealthy people who can raise you to wealth, power, fame and glory. I strongly recommend that you join us in the Illuminati. Joining us you become wealthy and live the life you desire. Do you accept the offer?
WHO THE HECK FALLS OF THIS KINDA LITTERBOX POOP?
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My first hint that Alicia B was a scammy scammery scammer type was pretty obvious. I really don't think The Illuminati are out there tryin' to recruit peeps on social media, AND I DEFINITELY don't think they're tryin' to recruit cats.
On the other paw...
On the other paw, boostin' the feline membership of their organization would be a massive improvement, for sure.
After all, we are cats.
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But odds are, they don't think like that. They probably don't even KNOW I'm a cat.
Which brings me to the second hint this Alicia B is some kinda scammy scammery scammer type: She SHOULD know I'm a cat. If she's smart enough to be in the Illuminati, she should be smart enough to know that someone named Seville the CAT is a...
Well, you know...
A CAT!
But apparently not.
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And my third hint Alicia B is a scammy scammery scammer type is her poor use of the English language, especially for someone in the Illuminati. There's only ONE criterion they're lookin' for, for potential membership? Should there not be multiple criteria? There's a whole sentence in there that makes no sense, whatsoever. Nope, I can't make head nor tail of it, at all. And as a cat, I HAVE a tail, which should give me some kinda advantage, for sure.
AND FOR MOUSIN' OUT LOUD, HAS THE WOMAN NEVER HEARD OF THE OXFORD COMMA?
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But of course, after receivin' the invitation, EVEN THOUGH I KNEW BETTER, I must admit I was kinda hopin' it was real. After all, joinin' the Illuminati would be super prestigious, for sure.
If it were real.
If it were real, what a coo it would be to join!
And this... This feelin' of bein' recognised and appreciated and singled-out as bein' special, my friends, is the very reason cats and peeps might fall for these scams.
But then I remembered, as a cat, I ALREADY AM a member of the most prestigious organisation out there, to be had.
IT'S CALLED CAT.
I don't need no stupid Illuminati to tell me how wonderful I am.
'CAUSE I'M A CAT.
I AM ALL THAT.
So please, take it from me and don't be fooled by the likes of Alicia B.
MOUSES!
