Wednesday, 8 November 2017

got a minute?

Hey Peepers!  You got a second?

Scratch that.

Hey Peepers!  Gotta minute?

Hmmm...  Scratch that, too.

Hey Peepers!  You have an hour or so, or...

WHO AM I KIDDIN'?  This is gonna take all afternoon, for sure.  MOUSES!

So Peepers, the reason I was wonderin' if you had some time for me, was...

Well...

WELL...

Well Peepers, we need to talk.

SERIOUSLY.

MOUSES!

About what must we talk, you ask?

WHERE DO I BEGIN?

So like I was tellin' Mason the other day, we're gonna have to do something 'bout those two freakishly long-haired marmie brothers of mine.

You didn't hear what they did?

Really?

YOU DIDN'T HEAR THEM DOIN' WHAT THEY DID?

REALLY?

For mousin' out loud, a kitty accidentally knocks a couple pieces of cutlery off the kitchen counter, and you hear that.

It was TOO by accident.

Oh.  Well no.  No, my jumpin' up onto the kitchen counter in the first place WASN'T by accident, but you're splittin' hairs there, Peepers.  You're SPLITTIN' hairs!

And speakin' of split hairs, I happened to notice you have a few split ends there, Peepers.  You might wanna make an appointment with the groomer or somethin'.  MOUSES!

But like I was tellin' Mason, you and I need to have a little talk about those two freakishly long-haired marmie brothers of mine.

No.  No, I don't know.  I don't know whether or not they have split ends, but hey, if you wanna make appointments for them at the groomer too, you could all go in to have your hair done together.  MOUSES!

But the thing is, Peepers, those two freaky long-haired marmie brothers of mine are gettin' into mischief like no kitties have ever gotten into mischief before, and...

What?  Well no.  No, THEY were not the kitties who were jumpin' up onto the kitchen counter the other day, but...

BUT YOU'RE GETTIN' OFF TOPIC THERE, PEEPERS.  The topic at paw is how Andy and Rushy are causin' trouble.  How THEY'RE gettin' into mischief.  How they're bein' naughty.  The topic at paw has NOTHIN' to do with any trouble I've been causin'.

If I WERE causing trouble, that is.

Which I'm not.

At all. 

I don't think.

MOUSES!

'Cause you know, Peepers, Christmas is closer than you might be realizin'.  It's gettin' closer by the day!  And I've always found, it's best for a kitty to be on his best behaviour in the weeks immediately preceedin' Christmas, and...

AND YOU MIGHT WANNA MENTION THAT TO THOSE TWO FREAKY LONG-HAIRED BROTHERS OF MINE, 'CAUSE...

'CAUSE WE DON'T WANT SANTA TO BOYCOTT OUR HOUSE ON ACCOUNT OF THEIR NAUGHTY BEHAVIOUR.

If Santa is gonna boycott our house on account of anyone's naughty behaviour, it's gonna be mine.

If I WERE bein' naughty, that is.

Which I'm not.

At all.

I don't think.

MOUSES!

Basically, Peepers, that's all I needed to talk to you about.

So uh...

So what are you plannin' to do about it?  Huh?  HUH?  What are you...

NEVER YOU MIND WHAT I WAS DOIN' UP ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER THE OTHER DAY.  Rest assured, there must have been somethin' up there needin' to be done.

And when doin' stuff that NEEDS to be done, doin' it is never naughty.

I don't think.

MOUSES!

12 comments:

  1. CATS can do no wrong, Pal. You DO know that, don'cha? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sounds like all of you need to start behaving. It won't be long until it is time for Santa. You all have a fantastic day.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh, rhose long haired marmie brothers! What are we going to do with them!

    ReplyDelete
  4. You buddy Nephi here... How dare they? Long haired trouble makers we have one in this house too your Peep might wanna teach them a lesson and take them to the groomers ����

    ReplyDelete
  5. We kitties are perfect, there is no such thing as bad kitty behavior. Well, except for Binga.

    ReplyDelete
  6. We have two of those longish haired ones in our home causin all kinds of mischief Seville old Marmie pal of mine. Thank Bast that our longish haired types are no Marmie's or we are sure they would be in touch with yours plottin and plannin something nefarious or other.
    Hope Santa Paws understands
    Timmy

    ReplyDelete
  7. When a cats on official business he or she is on business and the peeps shouldn't query that, after who knows what dangers and stray nip may lurk if it wasn't for us! They should be thankful to the point of more treats, for sure.
    Toodle pip and purrs
    ERin

    ReplyDelete
  8. I hope you are not telling tattle tales, Seville! Don't forget, Santa sees and hears everything.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I am sure Santa will not skip your house. XO

    ReplyDelete
  10. what? they think that their long furs make them less naughty?? HAH!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Bad kitties?
    That's just fake news...

    Noodle and crew

    ReplyDelete
  12. No, it's never naughty when we kitties are up on the counter. It means we are inspecting, supervising, investigating, spotting, or doing other very very important duties. Nothing that would have any semblance of naughtiness. Now I suspect that those marmie bros of yours look up to you and repeat what you do, 'cause they long for your approval. Tee hee hee. -Valentine (& Mom) of Noir Kitty Mews

    ReplyDelete

I love hearin' from my pals. I absolutely LOVE it! Just saying...