Sunday, 10 April 2016

he huffed and he puffed

Let me in!  LET ME IN!

No way there, Mister.  There's NO WAY you're getting in here and would you mind stop making such a din?

Then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll BLOW your house DOWN.

You big ol' windbag!  You already have huffed and you've puffed a lot, too.  In fact, you've huffed and you've puffed so much, you're beginning to look like a red-faced clown.  MOUSES!

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What's that, Peepers?  Pardon me? YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SPEAK UP, PEEPERS!  I can barely hear you.

WHAT?  Oh, you want me to stop yelling out the window?  You want me to stop making all that noise?  But...  But...  But...

BUT I'M NOT THE ONE MAKING IT.

Well yeah, I am making some of it but I'm not making it all.  MOUSES!

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Any of you kitties out there ever have problems like this with your peeps?  Any of you?  Any of you kitties have peeps who wanna blame you for stuff you didn't even do?

Now normally, I don't make too much of an issue 'bout this sort of thing because let's face it, there are plenty of naughty things I HAVE actually done for which I didn't get blamed but still..  still... still...

Awww...  MOUSES!

In a perfect world, a kitty would never get the blame.  Not even when he did get up to mischief and certainly not when the mischief-maker was someone else.  No, in a perfect world, the blame would always be laid at someone else's paws.  I mean, feet.  No, I mean paws.  No, I definitely mean feet 'cause peeps have feet and not paws and in a perfect world, all blame would always belong to the peeps.  MOUSES!

I mean, it's not as if no peep, ever, has horked up a hairball and..

Oh, maybe it kinda is.  Maybe it kinda is that no peep, ever, has horked up a hairball on account of peeps not licking their fur on account of their not having any fur to lick.  MOUSES!

But if peeps went around licking the tops of their heads, then...

Nah, they could never do that 'cause their tongues wouldn't reach.

But if they were to grow fur on their arms and legs and stuff...

Well then they would have hairballs and let's face it, they'd be horking 'em up all over the place.  MOUSES!

And do you know what else they'd probably be doing?  Blaming us cats.  MOUSES!

Just for the record, I would like to state that if a handsome marmalade mancat happens to hork up a hairball on the carpet and some peep comes along and carelessly and stupidly steps in it, it is not the handsome mancat's fault.  No cat, ever, has told a peep to step in anything they've horked up, I can assure you of that.

I mean, what do they expect?  Do they expect us cats to go around cordoning off all hairball sites. like crime scenes or something?  MOUSES!

But all that is neither here nor there for it has nothing to do with the windstorm we had the other night.  The windstorm that I was yelling at.

Oh my mouses, you should have seen it.  You should have HEARD it, for sure.  Perhaps you did for it was pretty hard to hear anything else but that ol' wind huffing and puffing and blowing like there was no tomorrow.  For a while there, I was beginning to wonder if there would be a tomorrow for that wind was on overdrive, for sure.

Branches of trees were swaying this way and that.  Branches!  Never mind the branches.  WHOLE TREES were swaying.  The big pine ones that are too tall for a cat to even dream of ever climbing. They were swaying so hard, I thought that at any moment we might have one falling down and landing on our roof.  Maybe even coming right through it!

Never seen anything like it.  Never heard anything like it, either.

So you can understand why, at one point, I felt the need to yell at that ol' storm and tell him to knock it off.  You can understand why I would need to do that, right?  Of course you can.

Peep #1, on the other paw, felt otherwise.  Apparently, when I was voicing my concerns, my concerns were deemed to be being voiced, too loudly.

Not my fault I had to yell to be heard over all that noise that ol' windstorm was making.  Not my fault at all.  MOUSES!

When you think about it, instead of complaining that I was being too loud, the peep should have been thanking me.  Thanking me that I told that ol' windstorm to shut up because I would like to point out, right here and right now, that by Friday morning, the windstorm had blown itself out.  Who here is gonna tell me that that wasn't my doing?  I mean, had I not told that ol' wind to be quiet, it might still be blowing up a storm today.  Maybe, just maybe, that ol' windstorm stopped huffing and puffing because I yelled at it and told it to go away.

And for the record, whereas cats should never have to accept blame, praise and appreciation are a totally different matter.  We'll accept praise and appreciation, any time peeps are willing to dole it out..  We'll even accept applause.   MOUSES!

36 comments:

  1. Well, I think you were very brave yelling at the windbag out there!

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  2. Those windstorms can be really scary, Pal! We know. Where we used to live, before we lived there, the wind blew the roof off the 4-STALL BARN. Now THAT's a huffin' and a puffin' to make us all say MOUSES!

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    1. It blew off the roof? MOUSES! I'm purring everyone was okay. purrs

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  3. We at The ARC would like to thank you and applaud you Seville for ending that windstorm. I can understand your dilemma though, it was a south wind and those are hardest on animals, they make a funny sound that animals can hear that humans can't. Thanks again and keep up the great work.

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    1. Standing at the ready to tell that ol' wind off again, if necessary. Hoping it won't be necessary, though. It really was super scary, for sure. purrs

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  4. We will never understand peeps, Sivvers. You'd think they would THANK you for hissing off that windstorm. MOUSES!

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    1. I know! Someone had to tell off that ol' windstorm and that someone was me. A bag of thank you treats would have been in order, for sure. MOUSES!

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  5. Well done Seville! Those silly beans just don't understand all that us kitties do for them.

    Well, we're sure all the kitties in your house appawciate your efforts.

    Sasha, Sami, & Saku

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    1. I should make a list. Yup, I really should. Make a list of all the stuff I do for the peeps and present it to 'em a few weeks before Christmas, for sure. purrs

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  6. I'll take applause - and TREATS!

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    1. Oohhh... TREATS! Yes, we kitties will accept treats three hundred and sixty-five days a year, for sure. MOUSES!

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  7. Great job, Seville! Of course, you get no thanks.

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    1. Of course. We'll just see if I thank Peep #1 next time she's looking for gratitude from me. MOUSES!

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  8. Oh my word! You got told you were TOO loud? Your peeps should have been grateful you were to paw to take action. Who knows where you could have ended up. We heard one girl, who didn't have a cat, ended up in OZ!

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    1. I heard 'bout her, too! See? This is why we cats MUST tell off the windstorms, for sure. purrs

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  9. Seville, you are da bomb! They are lucky to have your services. By the way, have I ever told you how handsome you are? You are. xoxo

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  10. Goodness, humans sure can be trying, can't they? Well, regardless, you did a mighty fine job scaring off that windstorm, Seville! Keep up the good work, and just ignore the humans if they fail to understand the importance of what you do. Purrs!

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    1. I think I did a pretty good job of it, too. What's more, I'm ready to do it again if necessary, no matter WHAT those ol' peeps of mine say. MOUSES!

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  11. Well done Seville! Someone needed to tell the wind to shut up. We get lots of gales here as well and I know how noisy they can be.

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    1. And that someone just happened to be me. MOUSES!

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  12. I think cats marking off their hairballs with crime scene tape would be a great idea :)

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    1. You do? Hmmm.. Maybe I should look into ordering up some crime scene tape or something. MOUSES!

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    2. We REALLY don't like windstorms!
      We had one about a month ago that was a category 1 hurricane! Good for you for telling that windstorm to go away.

      Have a great week...

      Noodle and crew

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    3. Someone had to do it and I figured, why not me? purrs

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  13. We think you were very fierce Seville and really brave!!

    Oh. And. Hairballs are an occupational hazard for pet people (and therefore NOT a surprise!!) HUH!!

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  14. Seriously...Mes is kind of missing Kozmo and Jo Jo...
    Now when mes horks in Mommy's slippers, or on the kitchen rug, or under the coffee table or in front of Mommy's closet, or in her computer bag...mes gets the blame!
    Kisses dear furrend, mes sure your Mommy loves yous any way
    (mes knows my Mommy loves mes)
    Nellie

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    1. You horked up IN her slippers? Oohhhh... I've never tried that! Not yet, anyway. MOUSES!

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  15. Your humans don't understand who helpful you are ! Someone had to tell the wind to be silent ! Purrs

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    1. That's right. Peep #1 should have been thanking me and not getting all upset. MOUSES!

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  16. as always, Sivvers, you are a brave mancat. Let's go adventuring! What say you my pal??

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    1. Definitely! We HAVE to go on another adventure, and SOON. Life with the peeps can be so boring. I need to spice it up, for sure. purrs

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  17. We think you are quite brave to yell at that wind! We should remember that next time!

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    Replies
    1. Seemed to work. House is standing, for sure. purrs

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