Wednesday 12 November 2014

they're STILL sittin' there

Yesterday, the sun was a-shinin' and the air felt fairly mild.  Peep #1 decided to get some stuff done out in the garden.

Although I had work to do on my blog and this gardenin' business was gonna interfere with said work - on account of my havin' to supervise the peep while she was in the garden - I really did have to agree that the peep's plans were good ones. One never knows when snow might fly here in Nova Scotia and Ol' Peepers definitely had a lot of stuff out there to do before the white stuff's arrival.  For starters, there was a box of dutch iris bulbs sittin' in my office, waitin' to be planted.  Those needed to go into the ground, for sure.  Partly because they wouldn't bloom in the box but mainly 'cause where they were sittin', was in my way.  MOUSES!

So I relented and agreed to supervise the peep, outdoors, while she worked in the garden.  I pointed out the iris bulbs, remindin' her to get 'em planted.

The peep immediately headed into the garage.  I again pointed out the iris bulbs on account of her not takin' them with her.  "Yeah, yeah..." she said.  "I'll get to them when I get to them."

The insolence of some peeps.  MOUSES!

I figured that the peep must be on a spade and trowel retrieval mission in the garage.  I also figured that the spade and trowel must be in hiding as Peep #1 was takin' so long to find them.  There were also strange noises emanating from the garage.  A lot of grunting and whatnot.  Either the rare, never-seen-before East Coast Sasquatch had moved into the garage for the winter and was movin' furniture and whatnot about in there in an attempt to redecorate or the peep was searchin' for a trowel that didn't want to be found.  Both theories were equally plausible.

It turned out to be neither of those things.  Peep #1 was merely trying to get the lawnmower out. Let's just say, the garage is a little on the messy side, shall we?

I explained to the peep that the lawn mower was unnecessary for the plantin' of iris bulbs.  "Yeah, yeah...' she answered.  "I'll get to them when I get to them."  MOUSES!

So the peep pushed the lawnmower down to the end of the driveway and turned the key.  Nothin'. Nothin', nadda, nadingkenpoop.

No fear, though.  Just meant the battery was dead on the electric start.  Not a big deal, right?  Haul on the other arm-powered starter thingy and the lawnmower should come to life.  So the peep hauled on it.  AND SHE HAULED ON IT.  AND SHE HAULED ON IT!

Sput...  Sput...  Sput....  Ssspppphrrmmmphhhhtttdadda.  Dead.

Okay...  Check the gas, I told her.  She did.  There was gas in the mower but perhaps not enough. Ol' Peepers said she was reluctant to add more gas 'cause what she really wanted to do was use it all up so that the lawnmower would be empty over the winter.  She was gonna use up the gas, mowin' in the leaves that had fallen onto the lawn.

She hemmed and she hawed but finally decided to add more gas.  Decided to fill it right up.  Then she started haulin' on that ol' arm-powered starter thingy, once again, expectin' the lawn mower to come to life.

Sput...  Sput...  Sput...  Ssspppphrrmmmphhhhtttdadda.  MOUSES!

What to do?  WHAT TO DO?  Oil...  check.  Gas...  unfortunately, check.  Spark plug?  "Nissy, do you know where the spark plug is?" she asked.

"You nipped or somethin', Peepers?  I don't even know what a spark plug is," I answered.  And truth be told, neither does the peep.  She merely knows of its existence.  Nothin' more.

She turned the lawnmower over to see if there was somethin' amiss in its underbelly.  Nope.  Clean as a whistle it was.  Nothin' wrong down there. MOUSES!

Ol' Peepers muttered some stuff under her breath that I cannot in good conscience, repeat here, as Nerissa's Life is a family-friendly blog, before pushin' the lawnmower back into the garage.  I peeked inside the ol' garage, lookin' for the Sasquatch.  Seein' none, I reminded the peep about the iris bulbs sittin' in my office.

"Yeah, yeah...  I'll get to them when I get to them," she replied.

Again with the insolence.  MOUSES!

The peep went in search of a rake.  Once found, it was hauled out of the garage, albeit much more easily than the deadified lawnmower.  Ol' Peepers started rakin' the leaves on the lawn, pushin' and pullin' them, this way and that.  Mainly sending 'em flyin' towards certain trees.

If my description of the peep's raking sounds somewhat haphazard it's on account of the general state of haphazardness that I witnessed, watchin' her rake.  She didn't have a clue as to what she was doin'.

Eventually, the peep gave up on the rakin'.  I cried a cry of relief.  Finally the peep would get those iris bulbs planted.  I watched as she put away the rake, expecting her next move to be to get that box of bulbs.  Unfortunately, she was headin' in the wrong direction.  MOUSES!

Instead of going back into my office to retrieve the bulbs that have been in my way for weeks, she headed over to the bags of leaves sittin' on the driveway.  Then she started dragging said bags of leaves onto the front lawn, tearin' them open and dumping their contents onto the grass.

"YOU'RE DOIN' IT ALL BACKWARDS!" I hollered.

The peep, bein' a peep, ignored me.  MOUSES!

She dumped bag after bag after bag of leaves under the big linden tree.  Then the smaller one. Then the two maples and there was even a bag dumped next to one of the new little crab apples.

I honestly have no idea how many bags of leaves the peep dumped out.  More than twenty. Perhaps thirty.  Might even have been forty.  At some point I stopped countin' and began to quietly sob into my paws.  Clearly, the peep had been into some bad nip and lost all control of her actions. Either that or she had signed up for that crazy pie bakin' course bein' offered by the squirrels.  Crazy that is.  Crazier than a squirrel makin' nut pies kind of crazy, for sure.  MOUSES!

Ol' Peepers was flatly refusin' to take any direction from me.  She was ignorin' my supervision.  She was bein' a peep.  Once more I must say, MOUSES!

After sobbin' my kitty heart out, I looked over at the peep.  There did appear to be some sort of pattern to her dumping of the leaves.  They had been dumped in such a manner that they were encircling certain trees.  I wondered if perhaps there had been method to her madness.  I wondered briefly.  Nah, just madness, I realised.  Nothin' but crazy ol' nut-pie bakin' madness.

The sun was settin'...  Who am I kiddin'?  The sun had set!  Ol' Peepers gathered up the now empty bags from the leaves, bringing 'em over to the garage.  I reminded her about plantin' the iris bulbs that had been in my way, in my office, for weeks.

"Nissy, it's too dark to be planting bulbs.  I'll plant them on the weekend, okay?"

I glanced, forlornly, toward the house, knowing that inside, in my office, there was a box of iris bulbs, still waitin' to be planted. I looked over at the peep.  I glared at the peep.  I sputtered, "But..."

She ignored me.  What a peep.

And as I do my final edits on today's blog post, I glance over at where the iris bulbs have sat for weeks.  For weeks upon weeks upon weeks.  And do you know what?  They're STILL sittin' there.  MOUSES!

65 comments:

  1. Hate lawn mowing at our sea, soo noisy. But when it doesn't work even more of a fuss, as Pat tends to cuss haha Maybe the bulbs will plant themselves, you think?

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    1. They haven't so far but I'll keep an eye on 'em. Just in case. That might be their only chance! purrs

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  2. Makes us wonder why we keep peeps when they behave like that. Aaaaaaargh!! Did your neighbours witness this behaviour?
    The REAL Maple Syrup Mob xxxx

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    1. If they did, they're not talkin'. Or maybe they're afraid they'll start laughin' at my peep. MOUSES! purrs

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  3. Oh we know all about that lawnmower sh*t. Lots of bad words come our of our Peep's mouth over the lawnmower. Sure hope that Peep of yours gets those bulbs planted Nissy. Take care.

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  4. Nissy, I'm sure those bulbs will get planted - after all you'll be supervising, right?

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    1. I sure will. The peep NEEDS my supervision... OBVIOUSLY. purrs

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  5. Aaaaaw Nissy so sowwy yous still got bulbs in yous way. Ow mommy didn't get wound to plantin' up nuffin this year. We didn't hav a hummer not once this sunmmer. No hummers on ow porch. They wuz evewywhere els but here. Da lawn crew bein' da idiots they awe pulled up ow humminbird vine and mommy wuz so busy dealin' wiff da pawtment afew da 2 floods dat hers didn't even cawe dat we didn't hav any hummers to look at. Hope yous get yous desk space back soon.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Lexi

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    1. The way the peep is goin', she's not gettin' around to planting 'em, either! purrs

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  6. Dang, that lawn stuff is so confusing. My Dad rides around on something and mashes the grass back into the ground, and someone stole our leaves.

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    1. They stole your leaves? MOUSES! Ummm... What did the leaves look like? I wonder if the bags the peep emptied out yesterday... Nah, those couldn't have been them. Could they??? purrs

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  7. Dear Nissy,Looks as if with your peep they'll be in the office forever!Love and hugs SheenaXX.

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    1. That's what's worryin' me, too. Worryin' me, for sure. purrs

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  8. dood...if de ground bee az crazed frozen ther... az it iz heer....welllllllllllll...ewe N iris might be spendin Christmas, New years, Ground hogs day, St Patricks Day, Easter and 12 new moons.... two gether !! ♥

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    1. Your ground is frozen already? MOUSES! We've got a few more weeks to go before that happens here. purrs

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  9. hai Nerissa! it RustytheKitty. iffins yoo peeps iz anyfing likes mine yoo prolly gonna haz to finds anudder peep to plants da bulbs! mine lubs to subcontract! fanks so much for a troo post on how peeps do eberyfing buts what we kitties tellz dems!

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    1. Subcontract, huh? Hmmm... Sounds like a plan! I'll see who I can get. purrs

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  10. Humans are such a puzzlement!

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    1. Seriously. It's a wonder we can understand 'em, at all. purrs

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  11. When do you get a hard frost? It looks like our garden will not be put to bed properly again. We paid for it by no hydrangeas blooming this year. This year our leaf blower men have a new contraption of ear splitting decibels MOUSES

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    1. Leaf blowers.... MOUSES! We've had frost already but the ground isn't frozen or anythin'. Won't be for at least a month, I should think. Maybe even longer. Sometimes, it's still quite mild in December. But by January, it's as hard as rock. purrs

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  12. You are going to need to get tough or they are never going to get planted. How nice of you to censor the blog from bad words, what a good kitty.

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    1. Yeah, the peep's mutterings were DEFINITELY unsuitable for my blog. purrs

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  13. The weather was super beautiful yesterday!!!! Today got a little chillier though, even had some snowflakes. Nothing stayed though, although my huskies wish it did!
    ღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!

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    1. It was super mild here, yesterday. Rained though. Today, the sun is out and it's cooler. Someone mentioned zero as the HIGH for Saturday but then I think it's gonna warm up again. purrs

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  14. Snoopervizing humans is such a hard work ! It looks like those poor bulbs are never going to get planted ! Purrs

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    1. I do my best with the peeps but you know... it IS hard. They do a very poor job of bein' supervised. purrs

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  15. Don't worry pal, I'm sure they'll be gone by this time next year!! BOL (not laughing at you, laughing with you!!)

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  16. I'm jealous… I am not allowed out!
    XOXO
    Lucy

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    1. I was actually born outside. Yup. Born in the neighbours' woodpile, I was. Now I'm only allowed out durin' the day but not allowed to leave the yard. purrs

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    2. Ummm... Not 'supposed' to leave the yard, I should say. purrs

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  17. Oh Nissy......if only our humans would listen to our perfectly good advice about stuff it would just save so much pain and agony wouldn't it? Oh no - we have to remind and remind and nudge and push and plead and in your case all of that still did NOT lead to the "iris bed project". Sigh. Well you TRIED and that's the important thing!

    Hugs Sammy

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    1. I did try. I really did. She just wouldn't listen. Just like you said. purrs

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  18. We are in a similar situation over here, oh what to do with those humans?!

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    1. It appears that the lack of obedience by peeps is a world-wide epidemic. MOUSES! purrs

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  19. Your human is lucky she has you to help her, Nissy. It sounds like she really needs you. She better get those bulbs planted though MOL! Or else you might have to take matters into your own paws...

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    1. Hmmm... I AM good at diggin'! Interestin'. Thank you! I do believe that I now may have a plan B. purrs

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  20. Well, sweet Nerissa you tried getting those bulbs in the ground. Maybe just a little more prompting will get it done. Mumsy couldn't start the lawnmower even if it had a sparkplug...her arms are too short to pull the thingy that starts it up. She needs help to start it but my paws won't pull that thingy either so I am no help. Lawn mowers are just one big pain sometimes...most of the time around here. Hugs and nose kisses

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    1. Yeah, I can't pull the starter thingy, either. I need a cat-sized lawnmower, for sure. purrs

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  21. Humans are silly!
    Have a great weekend...

    Noodle and crew

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    1. I'm plannin' on it. Plannin' on a fun and NIP filled weekend, for sure. purrs

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  22. Sheesh. That's a lot of work just to get some bulbs planted. But your peeps better hurry...the snow's already flying here!

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    1. I know! It's snowin' here, today, but meltin' the moment it hits the ground. In fact, I think some of it is meltin' en route. Looks like it's slushin' more than snowin', if you know what I mean. purrs

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  23. Have you thought of buying your Peeps a book on gardening for Christmas Nerissa?
    Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx

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    1. Already lookin' for Nip Growin' for Dummies, for her. So far, no luck. purrs

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  24. Another funny blog, Nissy. So sorry that your office is still cluttered with Iris bulbs. Hope Peeps gets them into the ground this weekend.

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    1. They're STILL there and today, it's snowin'. MOUSES! But next week it's supposed to get warm again so here's hopin'. I live in hope. All I can do. purrs

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    2. It's snowing MOUSES? Oh my! That is a CATastrophe. So are they Brown MOUSES or white MOUSES or Squirrelly NUTPIE MOUSES or PIEBALD MOUSES (oh, I hope not, they're the worst)? Tell us. Do they melt when they hit the ground? Are you overrun with MOUSES? an INFESTATION? We know all about infestations! All we can say is HORRORS (BTW - 6 weeks later, warranty on the MOTH EXTERMINATOR visit ended that day and within hours of the expiry a MOTH came out of hiding! HORRORS! We're thinking they have mini mini-iPads with calendars and they've been playing games and following Facebook biding their time until the reminder popped up - those devious, game-playing moths. the hunt is on AGAIN!

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    3. Yup, we're still infested with the mousin' snow. Gonna rain on Tuesday, though, so hopefully it will be all cleared up, then. Maybe the moths will be, too? purrs

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  25. Maybe you could transmogrify a kitchen utensil into a cattle prod?

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    1. Hmmm... I wonder if one of those big forks with only three pointy things would do the trick? purrs

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  26. Oh noes! And the nerve of talking back. Nope, that just won't do. Bet the iris bulbs agree too. Purr...

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    1. Oh yeah... The iris bulbs agree with me, for sure. purrs

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  27. Yikes. They're STILL there? Are those bulbs ever going to get planted?

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    1. Good question. That's a VERY good question, for sure. purrs

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  28. There's so much you have to take care of as a cat ;-)

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  29. Nissy maybe you can drag that box of bulbs into the bathroom where she will trip over them. THEN they might get planted. Sounds like your Peep MAY have lost a tiny bit of her sanity with all the leaves though.....sigh....poor Peep....

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    1. Yeah... Everyone else was baggin' leaves. My peep? She's dumpin' them out! MOUSES! purrs

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  30. MOL at Marty's iead - yeah, put'em somewhere's where she'lll trip over them!!!

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    1. And you know what? Two weeks later and.. they're STILL sittin' there! MOUSES! purrs

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