Sunday, 17 August 2014

friends don't let friends feed trolls

Whatever you do, don't feed 'em.  DO NOT FEED THE TROLLS.  They'll only come back for more and some of 'em will try to eat you alive.  MOUSES!

Yup, it's true.  Feed a troll, he hungers for more.  Starve a troll and he'll mosey on along.  Or maybe he'll just wither away and die from starvation.  Either way, I'm good with it.

Bein' an Internet savvy and internationally renowned social-media mogul such as myself...

Okay, scratch that.  Bein' a cat with a Twitter account and a Facebook page, I have some experience with trolls and let me tell you somethin', I do not suffer trolls gladly.  MOUSES!

Trolls are despicable, rotten-to-the-core creatures.

Much of the despicableness of that which is the troll stems from their diet which is comprised mainly of metal, wood and rocks along with an occasional Tweeter.  This incredibly unhealthy diet gives trolls a case of constant indigestion and chronic constipation.  It's quite uncomfortable, to be sure.

But don't pity the trolls because of this painful affliction.  A few more raw veggies and a few less Tweeters and their indigestion would subside.  To get rid of the constipation, I think they'll have to stop eatin' rocks.  MOUSES!

With all the burpin' and passin' of gas 'caused by their diet rich in rocks and Tweeters, you'd think you could see a troll from a mile away.  Smell him, at least.  But oddly enough, trolls are masters of disguise.  They're masters at insinuating themselves into the lives of tweetin' cats, dogs and peeps. They quietly lurk in the background, waitin' for their chance to pounce and when they see it, they seize the opportunity before them.  The next thing you know, they're tweetin' tweets designed intentionally to harm others and cause discord.  They wanna cause arguments.  They wanna cause arguments just to argue.  It's the very nature of the troll.

Yes, trolls are nasty, argumentative monsters by nature.  They like to stick their sticky fingers into the pot, stir it up and then sit back and watch.  And the moment the arguing stops, the trolls are right back in there, stirrin' the pot up some more.

My advice to anyone who meets a troll exhibiting such troll-like behaviour is very simple.  BLOCK. REPORT.  IGNORE.  Three little words that will save the victims of trolls a whole world of pain. BLOCK.  REPORT.  IGNORE.  Come on peeps...  repeat it with me.  BLOCK.  REPORT.  IGNORE.

You see, trolls can't exist in a world where they are ignored.   They feed upon the responses of their victims.  When you ignore them, their food supply is cut off.  They have to move on or starve.  Either way, you won't have to deal with them ever again.  BLOCK.  REPORT.  IGNORE.  It's as simple as that.

I know...  I know...  It doesn't always seem that easy but really, this technique works wonders with your typical, ordinary troll.

We haven't yet discussed the subset of trolls that have forayed into the realm of criminal activity.  Whether it's cyber-bullying or cyber-stalking, it is a crime.

This subset of trolls goes beyond the normal troll-like behaviour of lurking and waiting to pounce.  These trolls victimise specific people.  They attack them both directly and indirectly. They'll seek out the family and friends of the their victims, spreading vicious rumours and lies.  They're nasty, bullying monsters who set out each mornin' to harm the innocents of the Internet and they're as mean as mean can be.  They're a menace to society.

How do they choose their victims?  As I'm not a troll myself nor have I - THANKFULLY - ever been inside the head of a troll, I can't say for certain however, I suspect that trolls detect a certain vulnerability in their victims.  That vulnerability could be as simple as the victim bein' a nice person. Unfortunately, it gives it gives the trolls easy access.

And of course, if the victim of a bullying or stalking troll should happen to respond to said troll, the troll will feed upon that response, growing stronger and stronger as the victim weakens.

This is why it is ever-so-important that we ignore the trolls of the Internet.  By ignoring them, we starve them to death.  By responding, we feed them.  Please, if you see friends bein' bothered by trolls, strongly encourage them to ignore those dastardly, burpin', constipated, trollin' creatures. FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS FEED TROLLS.  It's a fact, for sure.

I do understand that sitting back and allowing a troll to spread lies and rumours is difficult.  I get it. One naturally wants to defend oneself.  But one must fight the urge to defend oneself because in the case of trolls of any sort, the best defence is always, no defence.  The best defence is to block, report and ignore.

What's more, ignoring a troll gives the victim power.  Power over the troll.  The victim has the power to choose.  By using that power and choosing to ignore the troll, the victim regains the upper hand. The victim gains power over the troll and said troll slowly starves into nothingness, exactly where trolls belong.

Of course, when one is dealing with this particularly nasty subset of cyber-bullying and stalking trolls, one must remember that the trolls are participating in a criminal activity.  So don't just report 'em to Facebook or Twitter.  Report 'em to the police, too.  Many police forces now have special cyber-crime units.  If you're a victim of a cyber-crime, you need to let the police know, for sure.

I have to say, when I see someone on Twitter or Facebook exhibiting troll-like behaviour, I block 'em as quickly as my little paws can type.  I block 'em in record speed.  I can block and report a troll in under three seconds.  I've had a bit of practise, you see.

And here on my blog, I don't see many trolls.  Actually, I don't see any at all which is a good thing, I think.

I meet a lot of spammers but spammers aren't really trolls.  Spammers are just peeps who eat a lot of processed meat that comes in cans.  Funny thing about those spammers...  Their mamas all gave them the very same name - Anonymous - and they all wanna sell me stuff.  Usually shoes, handbags and little pills that no self-respectin' cat who has been neutered, such as I, would ever require.  And as I don't wear shoes, I don't want those, either.  MOUSES!

39 comments:

  1. Fortunately, the trolls I run across are few and far between - and they are promptly dispatched!

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  2. Nissy there is one really bad TROLL on Twitter and she has victimized so many but keep saying other are victimizing her. She did it to me too and like you said you have a starve a troll. Sadly she takes in to many with her seemingly endless kindness until it turns and morphs into something hideous. Good advice you've given.

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  3. Mummy Janey had a troll..the stuff he wrote is still on line...but he can't get to Mummy Janey...we think he withered and died...or crawled back under the rock because Mummy Janey ignored him. We think trolls are like zombies, 'cept they feed off peoples' reactions. No reaction=no troll.
    The REAL Maple Syrup Mob xxxxx

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  4. Well said. Trolls thrive on the results they get. Ignore them and they've got nothing.

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  5. My momma has some troll dolls, but dey don't eat nuffin.

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  6. We don't like trolls. We will remember not to feed them!

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  7. Trolls are nasty creatures !!
    Best to do what you say with them :)
    Spammers wan't to give me stuff to , to bad it's always stuff I don't need :(

    XOXO

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  8. Booo to trolls! :-( Luckily there are steps to block/remove these vile creatures! Yay! Take care
    x

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  9. Poor Nerissa, sorry you had to deal with that. At first I thought you meant those dolls that the hair sticks up on- I had one when I was a kid and my mother tossed it in the trash ( she is superstitious).

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  10. Oh Nissy, I had done everything you said, but I did copy and save such troll behaviour before it disappeared. I had to exact a lawyers advice concerning the troll bothering me. Thankfully he gave me good advice and in the end the troll was sent away. They sure are nasty critters.

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  11. Ewwwwww, trolls! Yucky creatures. Your advice is spot on, Nissy.

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  12. We always ignore those trolls and we are certainly most happy to do that!

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  13. Stoopid trolls...why can't peeps puff up and hiss at each other, all civilized like us cats do?

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  14. Whiskers, Mouse, Sweetie, Etude and Rondo17 August 2014 at 19:55

    Well said, Nissy.

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  15. The woman was reading several books by a Swedish author and in two of them he has teenagers creating fake accounts all over the internet (forums and group sites like Facebook) just to say things that will make everyone mad and then when they get booted they create another fake name and lurk and when they think they can get the most reaction or they find someone who reacts to them they say something. It was a very interesting insight.

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  16. Well we have no use for those silly trolls. Life is hard enough without the darn trolls. You all have a super week.

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  17. Since we are not on Twitter or FB, we know not of these trolls of which you speak! They sound like the hooligans that we used to get at Cat Scouts all the time. If we ever run into any, we will be sure to follow your advice. XO, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Lisbeth, Astrid and Calista Jo

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  18. we have never met the trolls, thank Ceiling Cat...

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  19. We have, THANKFULLY, never met a troll. Maybe Tutu scares them. ;)

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  20. This is a great post! Sorry you had to deal with those idiots.

    Purrs xx
    Athena and Marie

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  21. Oh yes no Trolls aloud! Dem mean trolls been not nice to Zelda Rae Williams, the daughter of my namesake. Dats soooo bads. Weze not seen trolls on FB but we dont do much there... that might change. Mom says with all the kittys and Nana Mom to takes care of - no time to twitter round so we just watch bird tv instead.

    Now we do has to shut the door on spammers. they am so silly and say silly things like "Love your blog and this information is very useful. How did you find your information. please find my link." Ha! We dont has information! We has cats! So we not sure what to tell them. Maybe they want to know how to find a cat? Or where the spam am at Walmart? Me thinks that spammers dont know how to read.

    Thanks Nerissa for this loverly information... mol. wonder if trolls are tasty.

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    1. From what I've heard, troll meat is tough and sinewy and leaves an icky, bitter taste in your mouth. Even fresh, it's already rancid. I highly recommend AVOIDIN' it, for sure.

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  22. I hope this post has been inspired by the horrible news going round and not because you are your friends have been targeted!

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    1. Actually, I've been able to deal with all the trolls who have bothered me, quite easily however, I have several pals who have been bothered by the criminal kind of trolls a lot. One very recently. That's why I felt I just had to write this post. I don't like trolls bein' mean to my pals. purrs

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  23. Trolls are no fun,silly mean creatures!
    ღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!

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  24. We heartily agree! Our mom is still working through her bully/troll event in May. Serious HISSES to all those terrible people!

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  25. That's a great post full of very good advice ! Trolls are yucky critters, no fun at all ! Purrs

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  26. I've been told this too but GOSH sometimes you just want to lay into them and really say something!

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  27. very well said, Nissy! Happily I think trolls avoid me because I'm boring!! Spammers are another matter! Not so toxic, though. But I really don't need any of those little pills!!! Mol

    Nissy for Senate YAY!

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    1. You're not borin' at all! Bet the trolls avoid you 'cause they know you know how to block, report and ignore. purrs

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  28. Fortunately, we haven't run into any trolls. Hope it stays that way. Thanks for the warning and advice though, Nissy! If we see any trolls, we will definitely BLOCK, REPORT, IGNORE!!!

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  29. I's nominated ya for da Most Influenshal Blogger Award - ya can pick up your award here: http://lonestarcats.blogspot.com/2014/08/most-influenshal-blogger-award.html.

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  30. Gweat posty Nissy. Weez been vewy blessed and haven't had any twolls. Altho tuday weez noticed one of meez blog posts had a ping back and after openin' it, ow security app went nuts and made us shut down and westawt to fix da purraawlem. Weez not suwe ifin it wuz da pigback (in a foreign language) or not.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi

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  31. ummmm...as ever Nissy my pal...you have your own words that totally describe the whole essence about 'troll' protocols...thank Ceiling Cat...we do not have any on here...

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  32. we just ignore them hehehe but I do find them via the magic closet and poop in their shoes,xx Speedy

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  33. Good advice, Nissy. We don't ever feed the trolls. Heck, we don't even ever acknowledge them!

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  34. Eeoww Nerrisa a bery timelee bloggie!! We found out we had sum TROLLZ on Facebook n Mum did jsut what ya said n dey haz vanished.
    Me haz an Aunti who iz bein cyburr stalked on FB also n she sent Mum a list of da purrson'z 18 ale-eassez so Mum can make shure she doez not speek to diz purrson. It iz all bery weerd n me iz glad Mum nose how to deel wif diz!
    We haz a few Spammurz on WP but we just delete n all iz fine....haz not seen any Trollz dere phankfully!
    Phankz again!
    Yer furendz Nylalbue n Sherriellen Mum x0x0x0

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  35. very good advice and always good to remind everyone about it

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  36. This is a very informative post Nissy...because we don't really know the Twitter ropes very well...we thinks we may have had one of theese "trolls" who was attracted to the "George Clooney" aspect of my account...we just kept ignoring the weird tweets directed at us.

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