Sunday, 25 August 2013

you say tomato...

You say to-may-to.  I say to-mah-to.  Wait a minute.  I don't like tomatoes.  They're veggies for mousin' out loud.  What's that, peepers?  You say they are, in fact, fruit?  MOUSES!  Does everyone know 'bout this?  Should I make some kind of news announcement or something?  Should I call CNN?  Just kidding, peepers.  I don't think anyone really cares.

Actually, my dad likes tomatoes and that's just weird 'cause you know...  my dad is a cat.

You say po-tay-to.  I say po-tah-to.  Nah, I don't eat those, either.  On the other paw, I might like them if you slathered 'em up with real, meltin' butter and sprinkled some fresh nip on 'em.  Yum.  I could go for some of those right now, in fact.  Peepers, you have any potatoes on paw?  Don't forget the butter, okay?  Oh, and the nip, too!

Okay, let's try this one.  You say wild flowers.  I say, weeds!  Now that's the ticket. 

You guessed it.  Ol' peepers has been up to her hijinks in the garden once again.  What a peep.

Yesterday, peep #1 headed out into the garden.  Okay, she headed out into a particularly weedy part of the garden.  Please note the word, weedy.  With her, she had a little plastic container.  I asked myself, what is she up to this time?  I had to ask.  Curiosity got the best of me.  I shouldn't have asked, though.  I should have known better.  Curiosity gets you nothin' but trouble and nowhere but first in line to the train that heads directly to Headache City.  MOUSES!

I watched the peep while she was doin' this and doin' that around some queen anne's lace and then the goldenrod and finally, some white asters.  I wasn't sure what she was doin' but it looked like trouble.  Trouble with a capital T, if you know what I mean. 

Then she headed over to where there are some grasses.  Not grass like the fresh green stuff upon which I like to munch.  This grass was tall and brown and had all gone to seed.  I've been watchin' that grass, myself.  I've been half expectin' to see some farmer drive into my yard with a big ol' tractor and start hayin' or something.  Yeah, that's how bad that grass over by the compost pile, is.  MOUSES!

Finally, the peep returned to the safety of the proper garden with the proper flowers that are not weeds.  I peered into that container of hers and found that there were some seeds.  Not a lot but there were a few.  "You collectin' weed seeds now, peepers?" I asked.  Of course, I was joking with the peep.  No one in their right mind would be collectin' seeds of weeds, right?  WRONG!  That's exactly what she was doin'.

In fact, she was apparently sorry that she hadn't been able to collect even more of the things.  Most of 'em aren't ready to be collected yet, she says. 

Well for mousin' sakes, peepers.  Chop 'em down before they get all over the place!  Do I have to tell you how to do everything?  MOUSES!

To the container of her weed seeds, she added some seeds from my garden.  My proper garden.  She found a whole bunch of seeds for matricaria, shasta daisies and heliopsis.  Now, those are proper flowers, I thought.  Why she was dumpin' them into the same container as the weeds though, was beyond me.

Eventually, she headed out into the front yard and went all the way down to the edge of the road.  There's a ditch there that has some stuff growin' in it.  Not a lot of stuff, mind you.  Ol' peepers has planted a lot of things in there but, over time, a lot of those things have died.  It's sort of a dismal attempt of the peep's to pretty up the ditch.  Considering the fact that there's only a flower here and a flower there and not much else, it's not a very good attempt at beautification.  In fact, I graded her once on it.  She failed.

Next thing I knew, ol' peepers was flingin' seeds here and flingin' seeds there.  She was flingin' seeds all over the place.  She was like a mad woman, I tell you.  She was crazy.  Crazier than a squirrel makin' nut pies!  Yes, there were some flower seeds in that mix but there were all those weed seeds, too.  'They're weeds!" I cried.  "Weeds, I tell you.  Don't spread about all the weeds!  PEEPERS!  WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'?  Have you gone nuts or somethin'?"

Then the peep turned to me and said, "I'll add more of the goldenrod and queen anne's lace when they're ready."

I almost fainted.  My jaw dropped and I stood there, staring at my peep, tryin' to keep my balance on all four of my paws.  I think I ate a fly.  Not bad, those flies.  It was just little one.

The peep seems to think that all those weeds are wildflowers.  I, Nerissa the cat, still believe them to be weeds.  Like I said before...  You say wildflowers.  I say, weeds!

I also have some issues with her choice of colours.  Heck of a lot of yellow and white stuff goin' on there, not to mention the browns of the grasses.  What about red?  What about blue?  We need some red and blue flowers in that mix and hopefully, they will be flowers...  proper flowers...  and not weeds.

Anywho...  I'm thinkin' I need to book the peep a first class ticket for the train that goes to Squirrel Town.  I'm sure I've heard that there is one of those in Nova Scotia.  Not many trains, though.  Most of the trains disappeared with the dodo bird.  Too bad, you know, 'cause trains are nice.  Trains are neat.  Trains are fun!  And trains are sweet.  Just last week I watched a show on television with ol' peepers 'bout a lady who vanished on a train.  Eventually, they found her, though.  Unlike the dodo bird and the Nova Scotian trains.  MOUSES!

34 comments:

  1. I just think they don't know what they are doin' you know? Lol

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  2. People are so silly - growing weeds on purpose . . . . . Lee and Phod

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  3. If you send us your address Mum will happily send your Mom lots of weeds.
    Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx

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  4. Good cod! What is with these hoomins!! My People put flowery bulb things in the ground in early spring then dig flowery bulb things up in autumn! Why can they leave them alone? They were happy there!
    ~Vicat

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  5. Wild flowers are good for bees and butterflys Nissy and of course Bunnies,xx Speedy

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  6. *shakes head*
    Why couldn't she just have flung seeds from PROPER flowers without adding those weeds in?
    *shakes head*

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  7. Well Nissy I would let the peep have her little fun with weeds as long as breakfast and dinner are on time. Just sayin.
    Purrs
    Timmy

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  8. Nerissa, you've got to be more direct! Pusia simply wouldn't let me get away with it. Besides, have you actually tried sniffing one or two of those weeds? Some of them are quite nice! Pusia sniffs them a lot - and my garden is really wild, as in unkept jungle! I'm sure you'll get used to them...

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  9. Some weeds really are pretty and can be called wild flowers. It is all in how you look at them.Our Peep thinks that some weeds are very pretty. Now the yellow flower all over our grass are a little pretty but not for as long as they stick around.
    Hope you have a great afternoon.

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  10. Nerissa, sometimes we wonder where your mind is going to wander…just like today. From fruit (tomatoes) to flowers to trains. We are reserving our opinions on the seeding until we see photos of what comes up next spring and summer. Purrs and hugs, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo

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    1. Yup. You've gotta be quick on your paws to keep up! purrs

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  11. One cat's weed is another cat's weed!! Geddit!! MOL

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  12. Someone's weeds is always another's flowers! Or something like that! Take care
    x

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  13. What mes don't understand is WHY the peeps spends so much time pulling weeds and there is just as many a day later!
    And the HBO WORDS!!!!
    Kisses
    Nellie

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  14. Does peep #1 want some English weed seeds too? Cuddles says what the MOUSES!

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  15. That was a great post Nerissa and probably explains why I don't have a garden!

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  16. To vote on the calendar for blogville go to: http://www.heartlikeadog.com. Scroll down past all the pictures and there is a list. select your favourite by name and hit the vote button!

    Lee and Phod

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  17. Weeds, flowers.....who knows?

    The Florida Furkids

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  18. Nissy, the only tomato l like is my nip tomato! Or is it to-maaa-to??

    Wally

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  19. I want to know where the NIP is! Enough of the weedy flowers.

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  20. My mom would love your mom's garden. She loves "weeds" =)

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  21. I think the big question is: Is any of this stuff tasty? And the second question is: Why doesn't she plant some SILVERVINE or at least some NIP?!?

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  22. It is interesting if you think about it....some weeds are rather pretty in the "flower" department but lots of peeps sneeze and get all drippy around them. Yuck. I do hope your peep angled over to the nip to get some seeds too - after all, she needs to be reminded of her priorities!

    Kitty Hugs, Sammy

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  23. That is a great garden Nerissa. Oh, M said her Mother used to have Queen Ann's Lace growing in the ditch along the road by their house in the country. M would pick it, spray it with hair spray to keep it holding together, and put it in a vase. She think's they are pretty.

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  24. I guess this is why we don't have a garden (we live on the 16th floor) and thank Mouses we can't see the silly things peeps do to the ones that are planted around our building (we live on the 16th floor).

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  25. We kind of have to admit we lost you at the word, "butter." But no, we think there ought to be some purple flowers in there too, don't you? Purrs...

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  26. I love to sniff flowers! :)

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  27. I suppose growing weeds will keep her out of trouble??!!

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  28. Hey Buddy, Do you think I could come over and spend the night? The stoopy Human is hacking and sneezing and she's just SO annoying!

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    1. Any time, my friend. Any time...

      Purrs,
      Nissy

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  29. Weeds! Mum is forever pulling up weeds. Thank goodness I keep her out of my workshop!!

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  30. Weeds are beautiful and good for butterflies and bees and other flying objects. Pawkisses :)

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  31. Mowzers, Nissy! Our collective heads are spinning with that tale! Disappearing trains and weeds and...*shakes head*

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