Sunday, 2 September 2012

the real story behind the story

Okay folks...  it's time to get down to business.

You all know how I'm sort of a news reporter, right?  Well, in my last post, I sort of glossed over a few things.  It wasn't right of me.  It wasn't very news reporterishly of me.  It's time to set the record straight.  Time to tell the real story behind the story.  Are you ready for all the gory details?  Well have a seat, my friends, and be prepared to hear the truth.

It all began last Saturday evening.  Peep #1 was in the kitchen with her nose stuck up in the air.  She was sniffing this way and that and then she said, "I smell poop."  She looked around at all of us cats.  We all gave her our best looks of wide-eyed innocence which is not difficult to do when you're a cat as we practise this a lot.  Then I spoke up with a little meow and glanced down upon her shoes.  The peep looked down as well and then the realisation came.  It was her!  The peep had poop on her shoe.  What a peep.

Further investigation revealed that someone - and I'm not mentioning any names here but it wasn't me although I do have three fifteen-year-old aunties who sometimes have little accidents - had pooped in the front hallway.  Of course, the peep had walked on it and tracked it into the kitchen.  Again, what a peep.  So there was nothing for the peep to do but get out all the cleaning stuff and give the kitchen floor and the area by the front door a good hard scrubbing.

Unfortunately, the shoe had you-know-what embedded in the treads and the peep thought it might be a gonner.  But thanks to my good friend Herman over from It's a Wonderpurr Life, a solution was found.  Herman's mom suggested the peep soak her shoe in a shallow bath of hot water augmented with Dawn dish soap overnight and lo-and-behold...  the shoe was saved!  Thanks, Herman.  Your mom is so smart.  I should just add that Dawn has not paid me to mention them.  We just like the work they do with poor, unfortunate critters caught up in oil spills and whatnot.

It was shortly after this incident that the screeching began.  Well, you all know what happened there.  That was when the peep ran out to rescue the cat who came back from nosey neighbour cat and ended up with one badly bitten and infected hand and wrist.  If you missed this little tidbit of news, you can read all 'bout it in my last blog post entitled, "a rough week." 

The peep went out to break up the fight but got bitten herself.  She came in and cleaned and bandaged her war wounds and that was when she realised that someone - again, no names but you might fathom a guess - had pooped on the bathroom floor and not in the litter box.  Boy-o-boy we cats were making life tough for the peep that night.  Luckily for her, the peep had the sense to not step in it this time.  But she had to ignore this second transgression 'cause the cat who came back was still in need of rescue.

So the peep headed out again only to find the two cats back at it.  This time she grabbed that cat who came back and brought him inside the house only to find that...  you guessed it...  someone had thrown up on the newly cleaned kitchen floor.

The peep got down on her one good hand and knees and cleaned the kitchen floor again before tackling the bathroom.  It was quite the night for the peep and I must say, she handled herself quite well. 

Now, you're probably all wondering why peep #1 was having to do all this all by herself?  Where was peep #2, you might ask?  Well, during all this time, peep #2 was away in Scotland!  That's right.  The second peep was off enjoying the life of Riley while my first peep was slaving away at home, battle-scarred and war-torn.

Things are much better now.  A week later, the peep's hand has almost fully recovered.  Her wrist is still a little sore and there's a bit of an ugly bruise but that will fade in time, I think.  The redness is all gone and so is the swelling.  The peep's doctor obviously took good care of her.  I really did think she should have gone to one of my doctors but the peep insisted on using her own.  You know peeps...  they do what they like.  There's just no talking sense into them at times.  But I guess everything worked out in the end so all is well in my little corner of the world.


Now, how's that for news reporting?  Am I ready for CNN?  Can't you just see me sitting at the news desk next to Anderson Cooper.  A news network with both a sterling silver tabby and a silver fox?  Wow, what a network that would be.  Someone should call them up and tell 'em so.  Don't you think?

30 comments:

  1. Wow, that was a bad week for Peep #1. Yikes. Glad to hear that she is a little better. But it was good of her to rescue the cat. We sure hope she has a better week now. Thanks for the great news report. Take care.

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  2. Gollygosh! TWO poop episodes is one too many. Poor Peep #1. Friday morning Mom and Dad had to deal with "somebody's" poopy butt, after only just getting back from their vacation. But they were very glad the accidental accumulation of poop on the butt had not happened while they were away. Because they know the cat sitter could not have dealt with it.

    Mostly we just dole out barfups around here. On carpets usually.

    Cat bites can be nasty things. We are very glad her hand is healing.

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  3. Poor peep#1 glad she's well on the way to a full recovery,but great reporting NerissaBunny Kisses for Peep#1 from Speedy and hugs from mum.

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  4. WOW! All you kitties had that orchestrated like a fine symphony. How did you manage to pull off the timing so brilliantly? Did you use meowie-talkies?

    Very glad to hear your Peep #1 is on the mend. You better throw a few extra purrs her way.
    ; ) Katie & Glogirly

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  5. Oh noes! My Human has been all "distracted" with her own stuff these last several days and has not been helping me visit like she should--so we hadded no IDEA of the drama and trauma your poor Mama has been enduring! (Ha ha ha--that rhymes!) It is shocking to read of her troubles.

    It is good she has YOU to rely on--oh, wait--no, you didn't really lift a paw to help her, now did you? Really, at least you could have identified the poopetrator for her. Poor Peep#1.

    We is glad to read that her hand is healing and we hope that there has been no more misplaced pooping from Whomever was the guilty party. Your Peep#1 is a heroine for helping poor Carson XOXOXOXO

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  6. We hope you gave your Peep#1 special cuddles and head rubs after the poop incidents - it's a wonder you weren't all banished to the garden!
    Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx

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  7. By golly you are more than ready for prime time!!!

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  8. That's quite a tough week for Peep#1! We hope you guys didn't give her any further trouble after that day....

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  9. Thank goodness Peep 1 is doing well now, thanks to her own strength and perserverance. I hope all of you have some mercy henceforth! She's had it rough.

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  10. Nerissa, CNN?? It sounds more like news for PNN, lol!! Your poor mom!
    We think she's amazing and very brave, too.

    Hugs,
    Tom

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  11. My mom read your latest post and said, been there, done that--got the tee shirt. Living with several cats ranging in age from 2-21 provides a variety of adventures just waiting to happen. And yes! Sometimes they all happen in one night. Like your peep, my mom just grabs paper towing & cleaner and deals with it. We are so lucky they not make us clean up our own messes. Yay!

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  12. Wow thats a right old week your peep had.. Give her loads of cuddles and purrs.. Glad she was able to save the shoe.. You have done a great job of reporting it all.. Hugs GJ xx

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  13. That's a lot of training fur Peep #1. Mebbe you kittehz should cut her sum slack this week. Hope she's all healed up now. XOXO

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  14. I have to say, you kitties really put your human through her paces! If this was your way of testing her, she passed! I am quite impressed. Also happy to hear that her wound has healed well - cat bites can be really toxic.

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  15. we are still waiting to hear who the guilty party was. Who pooped and who barfed lol

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  16. Holy Ceiling Cat!! Peep #1 is a wonder woman in her own right!!! She deserved lots of healing purrs and I am sending some right now...via UPS Express Service...ready Nissy??...ok, loaded the purrrs...get ready...grab fast, here they come!!!...Whoa! Nice catch Nissy, be sure to give them to Peep #1...paw pats, Savvy

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  17. Holy cod! That is quite a terrible chain of events. You're peep must be a real trooper to put up with all that! Glad her hand is doing better!

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  18. My Cod! Has yous been takinbg good care of Peep #1? Speaking of England, Makes sure yous votes for Austin as Cat Ruler of the World!
    Kisses
    Penelope, Campaign Manager for Asutin (CATachresis) as Cat ruler of the World

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  19. Of course you are ready to start to work att CNN , Nerissa !
    You are a GREAT reporter !
    Gad to hear that your Peep #1 is healing up OK :)

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  20. Well thanks for providing us with the "inside scoop on your peep and the poop" Nerissa. Never a dull moment in YOUR house that's for sure! Happy to hear your peep is better though - that was quite the adventure! I also hope the "unnamed suspects" in the misplaced poop caper have managed to locate the litter box so your peep can have a bit of a break from cleaning up accidents!! Like I said - NEVER A DULL MOMENT! LOL

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  21. You would make a great reporter, Nerissa! This article was so good that I even felt a little sorry for your human!
    Purrs

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  22. You're a fantastic reporter kitty! Forget sitting beside that guy, take over for him!

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  23. What a story! Mommy says a HORROR story, but as usual she's exaggerating.

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  24. Nerissa you are definitely prime time material. Glad the peep is healing xx

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  25. Great reportin! The article made us realize that we have been making things too easy on TBT.

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  26. Meeoowww Nerissa! You should be on 60 Minutes.

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  27. Your poor peep! She did have a rough day! We are glad her hand is doing much better. You did an excellent job reporting and scooping the poop.

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  28. The Human forgot to say how much she adores Anderson Cooper. She thinks you two would make an excellent team.

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  29. Mowzers, we'r just getting caught back up - you've done an excellent job mews reporting! We can just see your peep with nose in air "I smell POOP!"

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